We often find parallels in our lives to the lives of those around us. It's what provides empathy and perspective in our relationships.
I was thinking that today after my six-month old rough collie and I returned home after his first sheep herding class. Like the parent of a high school senior or college freshman, my expectations had been high and, in my eyes, he had done well. He wasn't scared, he did his best, he chased the sheep, and no one got hurt. Yet the evaluation form was blank. No skills checked. Just a brief note: "He's still a puppy, keep trying. Come back for a retest." I felt....disappointed. I drew the parallel to when our child is evaluated....class grades, team try outs, SAT tests...and doesn't receive the glowing accolades we think they deserve. We sometimes feel hurt. Rather than suffering in silence, I wrote (and revised, and rewrote) a short email to the dog trainer, simply asking for more feedback. Here is some of what she said, and I think you can see how it could apply to any student learning something new....."None of the characteristics on the form applied to him as he was mostly 'playing'. I believe that is important as this needs to be FUN; the training can get difficult and I want a boisterous, happy dog that's eager to work.... We should start to see more in the future as he will remember today. I'm glad you enjoyed today and very happy you gained some knowledge. (Your dog) will mature as pups do and we will give him lots of time to hone his skill."
I felt reassured after reading her comments, relieved, happy. Please remember this as you stand by your own "pup" during the challenges of their senior high school year and first year in college. It needs to be fun, they will remember today, and they will mature. Just give them lots of time.
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